Tag Archives: Gratitude

Laws of Success

Book on the beach

Napoleon Hill’s work and his book, Think and Grow Rich, have influenced many people within the personal development field. The basic premise is that our focus needs to be on being the type of person to whom whatever it is we are seeking naturally flows. To be successful, we must be willing to dream and pursue our dreams, with a burning desire and unwavering commitment, even in the face of adversity and failure.
What is even more compelling than Napoleon Hill’s book Think and Grow Rich, though, is his book, The Laws of Success, in which he outlines Fifteen Laws of Success. These are:

  1. A Definite Chief Aim — a clearly defined thing you want with burning desire to accomplish or achieve or bring to the world. Hill writes, “There is some one thing that you can do better than anyone else in the world could do it. Search until you find out what this particular line of endeavor is, make it the object of your definite chief aim and them organize all your forces and attack it with the belief that you are going to win.”
  2. Self-Confidence — In its most simple form, this is seeing the best in yourself and believing in yourself.
  3. The Habit of Saving — Develop the habit of saving 20% of everything you earn
  4. Initiative and Leadership — Do that which out to be done without being told to do it, develop the habit of initiative by taking some definite action each day that will carry you nearer your definite chief aim. Leadership is based on knowing your employees, knowing your business, and knowing yourself.
  5. Imagination — Imagination is necessary to create a vision of something not yet created or present.
  6. Enthusiasm — An enthusiastic state of mind will bring energy and momentum to what you are doing. “It is the vital force that impels action.” For more, see video 8 below.
  7. Self-Control — Self-control is what “directs your action so that it will build up and not tear down.” Self-control is the result of thought-control, of deliberately and persistently directing your thoughts and energy in productive, supportive directions. See video 6 below for more on this.
  8. Habit of Doing More Than Paid For — This is the habit of performing more service and better service that that for which you are paid. Think Zappos! here. As Tony Hsieh and the gang at Zappos! found, by doing more than what you are paid for, you are planting seeds that will eventually bear fruit. See video 3 below.
  9. Pleasing Personality — This is described in detail in video 5 below.
  10. Accurate Thought — This is the principle of seeing things as they are, and investigating rather than categorically believing all your thoughts. It requires the ability to distinguish facts from interpretation. See video 12 below.
  11. Concentration — “The act of focusing the mind upon a given desire until ways and means for its realization have been worked out and successfully put into operation.”
  12. Co-operation — Cooperation is what drives organized effort.
  13. Failure — Hill says that what we term “failure” is often more accurately described as “temporary defeat”. He goes on to say that “sound character is usually the handiwork of reverses, and setbacks, and temporary defeat.” So embrace it rather than fearing it!
  14. Tolerance — Tolerance is the path to developing positive and effective relationships with others, building bridges and furthering our world toward a state of peace.
  15. The Golden Rule — This is the “guiding star” of the Laws of Success. Because you reap what you sow, treat others as you wish they would treat you, were the situation reversed.

Here are the Success Principles, as delivered directly by Napoleon Hill:

1. Definiteness of Purpose

2. The Mastermind Principle

3. Going the Extra Mile

4. Applied Faith

5. A Pleasing Personality

6. Self Discipline

7. Positive Mental Attitude

8. Enthusiasm

9. Personal Initiative

10. Overcoming Adversity and Defeat

11. Creative Vision

12. Accurate Thinking

13. Cosmic Habit Force

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Celebrate Anything!

I have been a San Francisco Giants fan since I first moved to the Bay Area in 1990. It’s been incredibly fun to watch Giants fever take over as people change their work schedules around games, and break out their orange shirts and Giants caps. For me, the best part of having the Giants in the World Series, though, is seeing everyone celebrate wildly when they get hits, score runs, and win games. The sports bars are filled with people laughing, jumping up and down, screaming at the top of their lungs, giving everyone around them high-fives, and hugging perfect strangers. It’s just fabulous!

Why is it that we don’t carry this we’re-in-this-together, we-can-do-it, woooo-hoooo!!, yaay-us!, we-rock! energy with us into our daily lives? What would life be like if we did?

Ever heard the term tall poppy syndrome? It’s a term used in Australia, the UK, Ireland, and New Zealand to describe the jealousy and animosity that people sometimes feel toward people who are really successful. Were you taught to avoid being a “tall poppy” so other people wouldn’t try to cut you down?

I have a brother with disabilities, and my parents taught me that it wasn’t considerate or okay for me to celebrate my successes because it might make my brother feel badly. I definitely want the best for my brother, but wasn’t it kind of twisted to believe that by talking about how excited I was that my basketball team won a game, or how happy I was that I got an A on an exam, I would make him feel badly about himself?

I often see that phenomenon show up in some form with my coaching clients as well. A woman who is having difficulty conceiving a child feels badly when she learns that a friend or colleague is pregnant. A man feels jealous of someone in another group who gets promoted because he has been unsuccessfully trying to secure his own promotion. The divorcée can’t seem to muster the ability to feel excited for a friend who announces his engagement.

Feelings like jealousy show up for one of two reasons:

  1. You believe that when someone else has something you want it somehow means that you won’t get what you want
  2. When you hear about someone else getting something that you want, you focus on what is missing or not okay about your life

So many of us seem to feel as though it isn’t okay for us to revel in our successes and kick up our heels and celebrate when life is going fabulously well — because we don’t want to come across as bragging, because we’re worried that if we get really excited about all the good stuff, we’ll somehow jinx ourselves and the other shoe will drop. What’s up with that??

I’d like to propose a different paradigm, and a different set of practices. The paradigm is this:

  • Celebrating your own successes – large or small – is not only okay, it’s a good thing! It promotes your health and well-being.
  • Celebrating other people’s successes will bring you closer to others, and also closer to experiencing successes yourself.

Here are a few practices that can help you move into living this new paradigm:

Go Ahead and Celebrate Your Successes Out Loud!

  • Look for the things you are doing well and the things in your life that are great and exciting. Find ways to celebrate them out loud.
  • Pay attention to how you feel when you give yourself permission to jump up and down with joy. It’s a pretty good feeling, isn’t it?
  • When you do celebrate your successes out loud, notice who in your life gets excited and happy for you, and who tries to curtail your enthusiasm or cut you down.
  • I’d recommend you try to spend more time with the people who celebrate your successes with you and less time with people who try to dampen them.

Celebrate the Successes of Those Around You

  • When someone you know shares good news with you, if you feel excited and happy right away, go ahead and hoot and holler with them!
  • If you don’t feel excited for them right away, take a moment to put yourself in their shoes. Imagine how it would feel to get that raise or promotion, or fall in love, or sell your business, or sign the contract they just told you about. Let yourself feel those feelings. Drink them in. Then do what comes naturally.

Most of all, make the choice to celebrate anything!

Don’t wait for some major life milestone to start celebrating. What do you have to celebrate right now? Can you come up with something/anything to celebrate? Can you invent something? How about the fact that the sun is out, or that you are able to read, or that you have access to a computer and the internet? Why not celebrate the fact that you are able to see a world full of colors, or that there are people in the world who love you, or that you are capable of loving others? Go ahead … let yourself really relish whatever it is. Soak it in. Get silly! Feel the delight of it all. Let go of whatever conditioning has been constraining you, and CELEBRATE!!

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Finding Balance

A friend of mine just called to say that her good friend had a stroke. She’s in a coma now, and the doctors say it isn’t likely that she’ll come out of it. If she does, chances are that the brain damage she’s suffered means that she will never walk or talk again. She’s married. Her children are 4 years old and 5 months old.

It feels so hard to make any sense of this happening to a woman who should by all rights be in the prime of her life. Not that a debilitating health issue or the loss of a life ever feels like it makes sense. My 43rd birthday is a few weeks away, and these tragedies have already touched the lives of people I love:

  • My host-sister of the family I lived with for a year as an exchange student fell in the bathroom and died, leaving two children under the age of four motherless
  • A friend and former classmate of mine died of brain cancer just before turning 30
  • A friend and former colleague of mine broke his neck and is now quadriplegic
  • A friend and former housemate gave birth to a child with congenital myotonic dystrophy and, because it’s a genetic disease, was then tested and found that both she and her mother also have the disease

And then there are all my close friends who have battled some form of cancer before the age of 50: breast cancer, kidney cancer, tonsil cancer, bone cancer, brain cancer, non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma.

When I was younger, I never imagined that by this age my life would be touched by so much loss. My friends are people who are proactive in dealing with their health and well-being. They are non-smokers and physically active. They are curious about the world and open to learning and growing. They eat food that is healthier than most Americans these days. They are thoughtful and considered in decisions they make. They have lived lives that most would consider to be lives of considerable privilege and abundance. They are smart and extremely well educated. They have great jobs and good health care coverage. They have had loving relationships or are married. They are all loved by friends and family alike.

To see lives like theirs change so dramatically or be cut so short has been hard. Hard because they and their futures were filled with such promise. Hard because, for those who have died, I wasn’t prepared for the bright light that they were, that I loved being near, to be extinguished from the world. Hard because when I want to see them and hug them and listen to their stories about whatever is happening in their lives or share my stories with them, I can’t just call them on the phone or get together for a walk or a cup of tea.

Perhaps it is especially hard because they tried to do all the “right” things — whatever that means — to live long, full lives. And even so, they weren’t able to prevent whatever it was that happened to them. So, where does that leave me? Where does that leave all of us who are still here, trying to grieve and find some way to go on? How do we come to terms with the fact that so much of life is out of our control without feeling helpless and paralyzed? How do we live each day without having fear step in to pull us from the present moment and into the past that we miss or the future we wish we could control more than we actually can? How do we effectively find the balance between planning and preparing for the future and whatever life may bring and living each day to the fullest?

The path to finding balance is to:

  1. focus on what matters most to you – both today and for your future
  2. make the most of every moment of every day by being present

Are you clear about what matters most to you? If not, it’s worth taking the time to step back and clarify what you value and what your priorities are. Make a list of how you want to spend your time, what you want to accomplish, who you want to be, what you want to do with your one wild and precious life.

Beginning today, choose to focus your time and energy on the important things, rather than the things that seem urgent.

What are the things that you want most in your life today? Here are some of the things that matter most to me:

  • spending time with the people I love
  • being a life-long learner and living from a place of curiosity
  • getting exercise and eating healthy food
  • being generous and giving more than I take
  • helping people in need and trying to make the world a better place
  • spending time in nature and living lightly on the earth
  • having quiet, empty time alone
  • developing and nurturing deep personal connections with my family and friends
  • living below my means and creating financial security
  • being present and grateful for every day

Being present is about how I approach what I do each moment of every day. It comes from the desire to not miss a second of this amazingly beautiful, incredibly precious life. It is choosing to show up and be fully engaged in whatever I am doing – whether it is going on a run or clipping my 88-year-old mother’s toenails or talking on the phone with a friend or shopping for groceries. It is about giving whatever is happening right now my complete and undivided attention. It is by being present that I can find the beauty in whatever is happening. And in my experience, there is beauty in everything that life brings — even the grief. All I know is that I want to live my life fully. And I can’t do that if I’m thinking about the past or worrying about the future. Yes, I take care of the things that need to be in place for the future, but even when I am doing that, I try to give that (finding a health care plan, figuring out my budget, optimizing my asset allocation) my full and undivided attention. It’s when I distract myself by believing thoughts that I should be somewhere else, doing something else, that I find I’m unhappy. So, rather than just believing those thoughts, I choose to question them and then return to the task at hand, which is living each moment as it arrives. For after all, that’s all we ever have.

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The Invitation by Mary Oliver

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About Our Studio

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Take a Class!

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Intro to the Pottery Wheel
Intermediate Pottery Wheel
Beginning Sculpture
Advanced Surface Design

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Workshops & Guest Artists

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Art For Sale

[/et_pb_text][et_pb_divider color=”#fdb467″ divider_position=”center” divider_weight=”3px” _builder_version=”3.2″ max_width=”50px” module_alignment=”center” custom_margin=”||20px|” animation_style=”slide” animation_direction=”top” animation_intensity_slide=”10%” animation_starting_opacity=”100%” locked=”off”][/et_pb_divider][et_pb_text _builder_version=”3.27.4″ text_font=”Poppins||||||||” text_font_size=”18px” text_line_height=”1.8em” text_orientation=”center” max_width=”550px” module_alignment=”center” custom_margin=”|||” animation_style=”fade” locked=”off”]Class aptent taciti sociosqu ad litora torquent per conubia nostra. Quisque a vehicula magna.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row use_custom_gutter=”on” gutter_width=”2″ admin_label=”Shop Area” _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_margin=”|||” custom_padding=”||0px|”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”|||” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_shop posts_number=”3″ columns_number=”3″ icon_hover_color=”#fdb467″ _builder_version=”3.25.3″ title_font=”Poppins|600|||||||” title_font_size=”18px” price_font=”Poppins||||||||” price_font_size=”18px” animation_style=”fade”][/et_pb_shop][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label=”Button” _builder_version=”3.25″][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”|||” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_button button_text=”More Products” button_alignment=”center” _builder_version=”3.16″ custom_button=”on” button_text_size=”14px” button_text_color=”#ffffff” button_bg_color=”#fdb467″ button_border_width=”8px” button_border_color=”#fdb467″ button_border_radius=”0px” button_letter_spacing=”2px” button_font=”Poppins|600||on|||||” button_icon=”%%3%%” custom_margin=”|||” animation_style=”fade” locked=”off” button_text_size__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_text_size__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_text_size__hover_enabled=”off” button_text_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_text_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_text_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_border_width__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_border_width__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_border_width__hover_enabled=”off” button_border_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_border_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_border_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_border_radius__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_border_radius__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_border_radius__hover_enabled=”off” button_letter_spacing__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_letter_spacing__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_letter_spacing__hover_enabled=”off” button_bg_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_bg_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_bg_color__hover_enabled=”off”][/et_pb_button][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ admin_label=”Testimonial Section” _builder_version=”3.22″ background_image=”http://www.personalpassages.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/06/07_img.jpg” custom_padding=”10%||0px|” box_shadow_style=”preset7″ box_shadow_horizontal=”0px” box_shadow_vertical=”-120px” box_shadow_color=”#1e1d1c”][et_pb_row admin_label=”Testimonial Area” _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”||0px|” column_structure=”1_2,1_2″][et_pb_column type=”1_2″ _builder_version=”3.25″ background_color=”#efe9e4″ custom_padding=”60px|60px|60px|60px” custom_padding_phone=”|40px||40px” custom_padding_last_edited=”on|phone” padding_phone=”|40px||40px” padding_last_edited=”on|phone” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_text admin_label=”Title” _builder_version=”3.27.4″ header_font=”||||||||” header_2_font=”Poppins|600|||||||” header_2_font_size=”36px” header_2_line_height=”1.2em” custom_margin=”||0px|” animation_style=”fade” locked=”off”]

Happy Students

[/et_pb_text][et_pb_divider color=”#fdb467″ divider_position=”center” divider_weight=”3px” _builder_version=”3.2″ max_width=”50px” animation_style=”slide” animation_direction=”top” animation_intensity_slide=”10%” animation_starting_opacity=”100%” locked=”off”][/et_pb_divider][et_pb_blurb use_icon=”on” font_icon=”%%90%%” icon_color=”#ffffff” use_circle=”on” circle_color=”#fdb467″ icon_placement=”left” use_icon_font_size=”on” icon_font_size=”48px” _builder_version=”3.0.93″ header_font=”||||||||” body_font=”||||||||” custom_margin=”40px||0px|” custom_padding=”|||”][/et_pb_blurb][et_pb_testimonial author=”- Rakib Hasan” quote_icon=”off” quote_icon_color=”#ffffff” quote_icon_background_color=”#fdb467″ _builder_version=”3.2″ body_font=”Poppins||on||||||” body_font_size=”18px” body_line_height=”1.8em” use_background_color=”off” custom_margin=”|||” custom_padding=”|||” animation_style=”fold” animation_direction=”bottom” animation_intensity_fold=”10%” animation_starting_opacity=”100%”]Donec non iaculis libero. Sed a purus sed nunc sagittis posuere. Etiam imperdiet nibh ut ex ullamcorper molestie. Mauris pellentesque augue turpis sed porttitor orci convallis.
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Subscribe to Our Newsletter

[/et_pb_text][et_pb_divider color=”#fdb467″ divider_position=”center” divider_weight=”3px” _builder_version=”3.2″ max_width=”50px” module_alignment=”center” custom_margin=”||20px|” animation_style=”slide” animation_direction=”top” animation_intensity_slide=”10%” animation_starting_opacity=”100%” locked=”off”][/et_pb_divider][et_pb_text _builder_version=”3.27.4″ text_font=”Poppins||||||||” text_text_color=”rgba(255,255,255,0.68)” text_font_size=”18px” text_line_height=”1.8em” header_font=”||||||||” text_orientation=”center” max_width=”550px” module_alignment=”center” custom_margin=”|||” custom_padding=”|||” animation_style=”fade” locked=”off”]Class aptent taciti sociosqu ad litora torquent per conubia nostra. Quisque a vehicula magna.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label=”Email Option Area” _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”0px||0px|” column_structure=”1_4,1_2,1_4″][et_pb_column type=”1_4″ _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”|||” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_2″ _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”|||” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_signup mailchimp_list=”SlavaET|03dac884f0″ first_name_field=”off” last_name_field=”off” _builder_version=”3.23″ body_font=”Poppins|600||on|||||” use_background_color=”off” custom_button=”on” button_text_size=”14px” button_bg_color=”#fdb467″ button_border_width=”8px” button_border_color=”#fdb467″ button_border_radius=”0px” button_letter_spacing=”2px” button_font=”||||||||” button_icon=”%%3%%” custom_margin=”|||” custom_padding=”|||” animation_style=”fade” button_text_size__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_text_size__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_text_size__hover_enabled=”off” button_text_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_text_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_text_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_border_width__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_border_width__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_border_width__hover_enabled=”off” button_border_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_border_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_border_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_border_radius__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_border_radius__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_border_radius__hover_enabled=”off” button_letter_spacing__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_letter_spacing__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_letter_spacing__hover_enabled=”off” button_bg_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_one_bg_color__hover_enabled=”off” button_two_bg_color__hover_enabled=”off”][/et_pb_signup][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type=”1_4″ _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”|||” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ admin_label=”Divider Section” _builder_version=”3.22″ background_color=”#1e1d1c” custom_padding=”0px||0px|”][et_pb_row admin_label=”Divider Area” _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”0px||0px|”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”|||” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_divider color=”rgba(255,255,255,0.12)” divider_position=”center” _builder_version=”3.2″][/et_pb_divider][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ admin_label=”Footer Section” _builder_version=”3.22″ background_color=”#1e1d1c” custom_padding=”90px||90px|”][et_pb_row admin_label=”Footer Area” _builder_version=”3.25″ column_structure=”1_3,1_3,1_3″][et_pb_column type=”1_3″ _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”|||” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_text ul_type=”none” admin_label=”Title” _builder_version=”3.27.4″ text_font=”Poppins||||||||” text_text_color=”rgba(255,255,255,0.7)” text_font_size=”16px” text_line_height=”1.8em” ul_font=”Poppins||||||||” ul_text_align=”center” header_font=”||||||||” header_2_font=”Poppins||||||||” header_2_text_align=”center” header_2_font_size=”24px” header_2_line_height=”1.4em” text_orientation=”center” background_layout=”dark” custom_margin=”||15px|” custom_padding=”|||” animation_style=”fade”]

Address

Class aptent taciti sociosqu ad litora torquent per 1230.
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Call Us

(+880) 123 456 7898
(+880) 123 456 7898
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Email Us

contact@divi.com
potterystudio@divi.com

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